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I recently read a reflection from Alice Camille about Qoheleth, the source write for Ecclesiastes in which she compares Qoheleth to the modern spiritual seeker: one who’s sat in too many pews and heard too many faith claims that don’t square with experience.  He insists that suffering is too hard and real to overlook in favor of religious fantasies that good people will be inoculated against all harm. Repeating creeds won’t make us happy or keep us safe. Honesty is the best policy, and if life turns on anything, Qoheleth says, it’s on the truth of human experience which is too dearly bought to surrender for a comfortable dogma. Alice declares that the children of Qoheleth are still among us asking heartfelt questions. And they deserve thoughtful engagement.

I would imagine she wrote that piece before the latest sex scandal in our church, but I certainly thought of the scandal as I read it. The tragedy and sin of the abuse that was so widespread for so many years is heartbreaking. The dogmas that the church holds and teaches and the behavior of so many of its leaders while proclaiming the Gospel and preaching the way of Jesus leaves us bewildered. How could it happen? How does the strong focus on the “mortal sins” of private sexual behavior, of engaging in sexual behavior with one who was truly loved—though the timing or place in life was not right at that point in time; how could the no-mercy for divorced and remarried Catholics be so stringent while priests and bishops were presiding at the Eucharist and engaging in behavior that was so evil and had such devastating effects physically, emotionally, spiritually on the lives of so many innocent children? How could it be not only covered up, but enabled to continue on for so many years?? How can justice be delivered? How can healing begin?

Besides the great anger that arises for the harm done to victims and the deep empathy for the overwhelming damage done to self-images and images of God in those who have been abused, I recall one statement in particular that came at the end of a long and difficult journey through a marriage annulment of one of my clients that read something like this, “clearly you are not a good judge of character, it is important that you take this into consideration before considering a commitment in the future”. I pray the church takes its own advice in the future as it accepts and ordains its ministers.

I am grateful for our Bishop John Brungardt, who has spoken honestly and asked forgiveness for the church, who has joined in praying with the people in various parishes for the victims and for the sinners and for the church to right the wrongs that have happened. He is a true shepherd.

I pray too for the many priests and bishops who have been faithful followers of Jesus and who suffer now because of the sins of others. May they know our support and may God’s grace hold them up!

 

 

 

 

I recently read the book Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone, by Brene Brown.
Brene questions true belonging and the understanding of the following Maya Angelou quote:
“You are only free when you realize you belong no place – you belong every place – no place at all.  The price is high.  The reward is great. “
 
The conclusion on true belonging is that you only need to belong to yourself and she provides the following quote. “True belonging is the spiritual practice of believing in and belonging to yourself so deeply that you can share your most authentic self with the world and find sacredness in both being a part of something and standing alone in the wilderness.  True belonging doesn’t require you to change who you are.  It requires you to be who you are. “
 
The wilderness where we often find ourselves standing alone.  It is an untamed unpredictable place of solitude and searching.  It is a place as dangerous as it is breathtaking, a place as sought after as it is feared.  But it turns out to be the place of true belonging and is the bravest most sacred place you will stand.

Brene suggest several things for Braving the Wilderness.

• Learn to trust yourself
• Do not let your past define you.
• Get close to those you trust
• Speak the truth to BS – BUT be civil
• Engage in moments of pain and joy with others
• Have a strong back, a soft front and a wild heart

A strong back is our courage muscle – learning how to stand up for yourself, a soft front is the birthplace that brings meaning to life – not a place of weakness but a place of vulnerability.  A wild heart is living out the paradox of love in your life.  The ability to be tough and tender, excited and scared, brave and afraid – all in the same moment.  Showing up in your vulnerability and courage, being both fierce and kind.
 
She suggests 7 elements for Braving the Wilderness
B – Boundaries - learn to set, hold and respect boundaries
R – Reliability - learn to say what you mean and mean what you say
A – Accountability – step up, take responsibility, and apologize when needed
V – Vault – learn to keep confidences and share your information with someone who keeps confidences
I – Integrity – learn to practice values even with it is hard or uncomfortable
N – Nonjudgement – learn how listen to others and offer to help with judging
G – Generosity – be generous with others and in your assumption of others.
 
I have spent much time in self-reflection after reading this book.  Some of the things that I reflected on are: