The Weekly Hash Headlines from Newcastle Hash House Harriers

The Lonsdale, Jesmond
Hares:  Daft Twankey (B*det run ) and Woof Woof
Having wrested back editorial control from roving reporter BM after 2 weeks of skivving , GH is back in the hot seat reporting live from Jesmond metropolis.
Hashers gathering outside the Lonsdale pub were met with explicit instructions by the R*nning hare to 1)  pay attention to markings, 2) take a torch and 3 ) expect shiggy. The pack headed off down the street, emerging some time later at the Great North Road to the Town Moor where those extra keeno runners would have appreciated that they were joining the moor at the 3km point of the free Newcastle  Park Run which takes place very Saturday on the dot of 9. (All welcome, breakfast at Longhorns is recommended afterwards)
Emerging into Exhibition Park the pack then followed a course dotted with obstacles and children’s play equipment. A couple of hashers including Hash Sab, Slippery When Wet and Pimp took the opportunity to take a turn on the slide before regrouping with the pack to the other side of the Moor.  At this point, all running attire appeared dry and unmarked but this state of affairs was to be shortlived as the trail headed higher and up the hill. Off road, the trail became perilously boggy, hashers began to struggle to keep their balance ( and footwear) as they ascended the first hill. By the second hill the hash had become separated, the sounds of merry laughter died under the darkling sky as the relentless sound of squelching and distressed breathing took over. NG was never seen again, Misled lost an arm, and Pop was only rescued after his flashing necklace highlighted his location to his rescuers as he sank into a bog. Bad times.
On a lighter note the survivors were promised a free beer stop at Daft Twankeys and with that in mind they abandoned their missing companions and headed Jesmondside for lashings of beer and hot buffet delights. Replete  with food, the pack headed south, back to the pub for a very quick and chilly circle before retiring to the pub for chit chat and drinking.
Thanks to the hares – another lovely run,
Stats and Special Notices
Shiggy – Immense ( how ? it hasn’t rained for days)
Hills – 2
Hash hounds – 1
Birthdays – 1
Awesome beer stop with (hot)  food – 1
Doggy bags - 1
Town Moors -1
Turnout – Pretty good
Returner – 1
Circle – Short ( windy spot)
Widdlers – 2
Short cutters – 2
Flashing hasher – 1 ( Pop)
Latecomers -1
Nightlife Scenery – V. Cool
Stars – “In their multitude” will only BM and MP get this reference ?

Next Weeks Hash

Next Week Hash Location : The Green, White Mare Pool Next Weeks Hares : Pimp
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