When Bread Knife Bill comes to stay,
even the birds fly off for the day.
Better to go deaf than see in Bill's mind,
it was prickly and hard yet somehow fur-lined.
Eat up all your drink, give the wife a quick wink,
then stumble off to pass out in the downstairs sink
The very next day, foul odors pervade.
It seems that Bill's smell will never fade.
He slimes like a slug where ever he be,
glows in the dark with eyes that can see.
Another clean spot that needs drenched in his piss,
I wish he'd find another place than this
Seems Bread Knife is here to stay,
shows no sign of going away.
There's empty bottles and crying wife,
bits of sick to pepper this strife.
Zigzag trails of piss on the floor,
I sure wish he wouldn't come around here no more
Empty fridge and overflow trash,
slime on the ceiling, and missing weed stash,
silhouette of dog-ends in the shape of that twat,
with a steaming pile of what Bill just shat.
No garden pots that lack in his pee,
I wish he'd find another friend than me
Still to this day that damn Bill ain't gone,
screamin' and yellin' to finish his song.
Try as I might to scribble a tune,
the words don't come a moment too soon.
So Bread Knife Bill will never leave,
in madness I'll die first, I do believe