Saturday, September 22, 2018

Ephesians 4:32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.

"I" LANGUAGE

There is no surer way of turning a discussion into a fight than to start off by accusing the other person. A far better approach is to use that which is called "I" language. When using "I" language I am expressing how something makes me feel. If I use "you" language, it is probably going to sound condemning and puts the other person immediately on the defensive.

For example, there is a world of difference between saying, "I am uncomfortable arriving late at church. Is there anything I can do to help?" and "You always make us late for church. You don't even care, do you?"

It is vital to remember that we are dealing with someone we love. Our spouse or our children or our Christian friend is not our enemy.

It is a good idea to focus on the behavior of the person rather than on the person's character. Since we cannot read each other's heart, concentrate on the facts rather than on the motive. Few things are as hazardous as presuming to tell someone what he thinks or feels.

We want to understand each other, so it is important to speak clearly and to listen patiently and carefully. To resolve the matter, we turn to the Scriptures for guidance.

What it finally all boils down to is daily exercising ourselves in the Ministry of the Keys--honestly confessing our sins to each other and readily forgiving one another.

This is essential especially when there has been a confrontation. Our priority is not to prove that we are right, but to give and receive the very forgiveness of sins which Christ won on the cross.

Christ Himself has granted each believer the authority, privilege, and responsibility to forgive sins and open heaven's gates. No better expression of love can ever be given or received.

"And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you" (Ephesians 4:32).