Ask Gertrude: Glamorous Jet-Set Knitting
Worried about finding knitting opportunities while a mile-high? Gertrude Woolsworthy turns her mind to creative ways of getting around airline securty for lovely and sadly leaving S&B Londoner, MrsNeedles (we’ll miss you).
Dear Aunty Gerty,
I am about to leave these snow-bound shores for an (even snowier) life on the other side of the pond. It’s only a short sojourn you understand, at around four months, but the perils of packing for a journey such as this given the limits of modern air travel have put me into quite a quandary with two major questions.
Firstly, what sort of project would you choose as being appropriate for my initial journey, and secondly what level of knitting supplies would you consider taking with you for the longer term?
After all I need to consider any possible confusion by the powers that be at Heathrow between tools required to create fibre-filled joy and those required to create havoc and devastation, and even a slow knitter such as I will need more than one project for this kind of duration.
Yours in search of guidance,
My Dear Needles, what a pickle you have landed yourself in by leaving our lovely shores for distant lands.
Now, to address your first problem. In these cautious times, you need to find some way to disguise your knitting kit. After all, a shiny needle can be mistaken for a stiletto knife and a lovely set of interchangeable circulars for a deluxe garroting kit by a shortsighted security man, and that ball of lovely merino, why, it's rope for tying up the pilot.
No, you need to be more creative these days.
Your first point of disguise is when you book your flight. Emphasise to the booking staff that you are a high-class traveller and you have very specific dietary requirements. You can only eat Chinese food. With chopsticks. Emphasise that they don't need to worry about the chopsticks as you will provide your own. Write “Haha! These are knitting needles, you fools!” in Chinese on the ends of your best bamboo needles to complete the disguise.
Now to get your yarn on board. Knit your yarn into a lovely blanket before the flight. Nobody will suspect a thing as your classy air traveller likes to bring their own blanket.
When on board, take out your chopsticks and blanket and start knitting from the end of the blanket to create a lovely shawl to wrap around yourself as you step off your flight. A new knit and a disguise should you be on the run from Interpol.
As for taking knitting supplies, are you quite mad?! You will be in the home of Knit Picks and the brave. There is a wealth of supplies over there that you have no access to here so you should regard this as an opportunity to acquire lovely, lovely yarn.
This will also have the advantage of leaving more space in your luggage. Is that a Gerty shaped hole I see in that bag?
See this question and others that didn’t make the newsletter on Gerty’s blog.