I've enjoyed the slow start to the year but I'm pumped to jump into some live shows again, specifically the week-long Listening Room Festival in Tampa - a city-wide house concert festival. I'll be playing daily performances in folks homes other intimate spaces. Links below if you'd like to attend, make a vacation of it, and discover a ton of new favorite artist in the meantime!

 

Jan 23: PHILLY - Attic Brewing Company [facebook]

Feb 26: BOLIVAR, MO - Private Event

 

 

By the time I reached September of 2018 I shut down and decided to put a halt on booking (while still fulfilling pre-booked commitments). The silence and rest was priceless. By the time 2019 rolled around I had relinquished all control. I threw my hands up in the air and prepared myself for anything and nothing. Seriously. I forced myself to make no plans. For a goal-oriented list maker, this was single-handedly the hardest thing thing I had ever done. No plans for the year. No goals, just be open. 2 weeks in I was kind of tired of this plan. Getting restless. By month 2, I felt a bit frustrated and directionless. 

 

At the beginning of March, something ridiculous dropped in my lap. An NYC theater producer who had heard Bigger Than Your Box reached out asking me if I'd be interested in writing the music for a musical theater production that was projected to ultimately land on Broadway when the time came. No guarantees on that last part, but it was the hope given the involved parties. I freaked out. Not in the "I can't believe this is happening to me" kind of way, but in the "Heck no! I'm not capable and would never be able to do this in a million years" kind of way. Said producer took a train down from NYC, we had coffee, talked about the project, and she attended my show in Philly that evening. A few weeks later after thinking it through, getting counsel from a few friends, talking to a mentor, and deciding that my fear list (which happened to be way longer than my "excitement list") was garbage and I should toss it out, I decided to say "Yes". It was only after saying yes that I realized the Director of the Musical was Diane Paulus - director of Waitress (Sara Barielles), Pippin, Finding Neverland...and so many other notable Broadway musicals.. The project we'd be working on would be "Begin Again" - an adaptation of the movie starring Mark Ruffalo, Kierra Knightly, and Adam Levine. (By the way, if you're an  independent artist you should watch this movie. You will love it, i promise!) 

 

The following months involved multiple train rides to NYC, meetings with Diane, producers, different music supervisors, and attending  a number of shows, including Waitress. I also watched Begin again enough times that I could quote the lines. Seriously, watch it! By Spring, the powers that be had landed on a writer - Jenny Bick ( writer for The Greatest Showman and creator/writer of Sex in the City). At this point, and after watching Begin Again, I was feeling excited (still nervous, but excited) about songwriting for other characters that weren't me - writing in different voices, and having the wisdom and expertise of women much further along in their careers to help facilitate that process. I was also especially excited to be partnering up w/ Nadia Digliallonardo. (second from right in photo) whose sole job was to translate my singer/songwriter songs compositionally into something workable for theater. Not being able to handle that on my own had been my biggest hesitation and reason for wanting to say no from the get-up bu knowing that she had worked with Sara Barielles in the same capacity was encouraging!

 

Come May, we had our first meetup (pictured above). The four of us met in NYC. I was the sickest I've been in years but there was no way I was not going! We spent a few days, watching the film, combing through character profiles and discussing preliminary ideas on how we might adapt it all visually and musically. Over the course of the summer, my agent was negotiating a contract with the production company. At this point I had expected to be committed to this process for the next several years, which was an answer to prayer given that this restless list-maker had still been looking for some structure to her order-less life. Come early fall, i received a call from the producer and learned that one of the above ladies had dropped off and that the project was on hold indefinitely. The latter part of the summer had been pretty quiet with little movement, so I had begun to suspect something had changed. I had also been 'prepped' by a number of friends who cautioned me that the Musical Theater world is hugely unpredictable. So when i got the news, I was a weird mix of prepared+disappointed. I had spent much of the summer emotionally preparing for the best and worst case scenario - thinking about what I might want to do next alternatively, and keeping myself from starting the song-writing process until there was clear guidance on the direction we would be taking for the musical. For the next 4-6 weeks I worked heavily on the Mister Rogers project (i released that in November) and after the dust settled from the crazy holidays, I knew I would be faced with the question that has recently become a dear - what next? 

 

It's 2020, and in some ways I am back where I was this time last year. A blank slate.My close friends have asked me if I'm disappointed or angered by the seemingly "false start" of this whole experience.  My answer" NOPE! There are just too many intricacies, too many parts of the above story that I'm not able to succinctly share here, but if you knew how timely and life changing this whole experience was, you'd understand how providential its all been. 2019 truly was a year where anything could happen. And it did! I was reminded over and over again (with this experience, and a few others) that anything can happen and that the sky really is the limit. I was reminded over and over and over again of God's goodness and that when I've come to the end of myself, he's there waiting to open the doors. I don't have to bang them down. I just need to be ready to walk in.