Greetings & Blessings to all
Welcome to our October newsletter.
You must have all noticed I figured out how to put the graphics in the newsletter the way Bridget did. I didn’t hear from anybody about not getting the newsletter so, I’ll assume everything is all right. I gathered a few links and jokes from some of you last month; keep them coming I expect to do a lot of newsletters right into next year. I hope everyone survived the nasty weather in the United States and in Ireland. Here in our Ohio river valley it has been eerily calm. Which is all right with me. We’ve had a little rain that we needed but not enough to ruin any, well, many, days. The rose bushes I planted for Bridget are blooming well. I suppose it’s the blush of Autumn. Then I have to prune them so they’ll do well next Spring. I’m also learning to cook. Don’t get excited I’m terrible but I haven’t poisoned myself yet.
We’re all in this together let’s make it as good as we can. Stay with me everybody.
Enough of the blather...
Is this your first edition? Many thanks for joining us and if you like our musings and meanderings. please feel free to share them with your family and friends. And do encourage them to sign up. The more of us, the merrier! And for all of our readers, we hope this issue finds you in good health, good spirits and good company.
On with the update...
IN THIS ISSUE:
Quips, Quotes, Proverbs & Toasts
A Bit of the Wit
Joke of The Month
Did You Know
The week That Is
Leave 'em Laughing
SPONSOR: We are delighted to feature a new sponsor: Arans of Ireland
As you would expect, yes, they focus on Aran Irish knits and also on a line of Irish jewelry. I’ve had a good look myself. The knits have rather different colors and styles than I usually see and all very good looking. If I didn’t already have too many Irish knits I would be tempted to add another. They also have a line of Shanore jewelry. Being male I can’t speak to this with any authority but it is beautiful. I’m particularly struck by the line of Claddagh birthstone necklaces. Everything is well worth a look, two looks. Go see for yourself, you won’t be disappointed.
1. September date confirmed for next year’s All-Ireland football final
The 2018 All-Ireland senior football final date has been confirmed as September 2 with the hurling decider, as was explained after Special Congress last Saturday week, set to be staged on August 19, writes John Fogarty.
IRISH-AMERICAN CEILI CLUB
IRISH-AMERICAN CEILI CLUB
Annual Halloween Ceili 10/21, 7-10 pm
St. Sebastian Parish Hall
2000 SE 25 Avenue, Fort Lauderdale
Music : FIRE IN THE KITCHEN
Tea, Coffee, cakes...BYOB.
Admission $10 members, $12 non-members
Call 954-926-6568 / 754-281-7202
3. Liam Neeson to receive diaspora award for contribution to Ireland
4. What do Ireland’s county names mean?
5. Wales 0-1 Rep. of Ireland | European Qualifiers
Highlights of a famous night for the Irish as James McClean's second-half goal ensured a play-off spot. (Action from the European Qualifiers for the 2018 World Cup)
6. Magnificent Midlands? Wild Atlantic Way-style branding for the middle of Ireland on way
Fáilte Ireland has advertised for consultants to help the organisation build a brand for the midlands to emulate the success of the Wild Atlantic Way and Ireland’s Ancient East.
7. The Irish Farmer Calendar is back - and it doesn't disappoint
Some of Ireland's most eligible farming talent have stripped off for a calendar that has been nicknamed "agri porn."
Swapping gruelling farm work for a photoshoot, the men have done their best to give supermodels like Kendall Jenner and Gigi Hadid a run for their money.
These snaps are from the latest Irish Farmer Calendar, which is now in its 9th year.
The ‘porn’ is a ridiculous exaggeration. Bridget used to get a kick out of this calendar.
QUOTES, TOASTS , CURSES AND BLESSINGS
They invented the three-day bank holiday weekend because you can't lump all the bad weather into just Saturday and Sunday.
A BIT OF THE WIT
Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf.
JOKE OF THE MONTH
Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal, and says to the first man he meets, “Do you want to go to heaven?”
The man said, “I do Father.”
The priest said, “Then stand over there against the wall.” Then the priest asked the second man, “Do you want to got to heaven?”
“Certainly, Father,” was the man’s reply.
“Then stand over there against the wall,” said the priest.
Then Father Murphy walked up to O’Toole and said, “Do you want to go to heaven?”
O’Toole said, “No, I don’t Father.”
The priest said, “I don’t believe this. You mean to tell me that when you die, you don’t want to go to heaven?”
O’Toole said, “Oh, when I die, yes. I thought you were getting a group together to go right now.”
DID YOU KNOW
1. In 1986, a 900 year old cheese was found perfectly preserved, in a Tipperary bog?
- That must have been really sharp cheese.
2. Donkeys were useful in Ireland because of the way they put down their hooves? They do it in a pattern different from horses which allows them to traverse bogland in a gliding movement.
3. Swallowing a live frog was an old Irish cure for a stomach ache?
THE WEEK THAT IS
1. Article: How the Irish invented Halloween
2. Article: A Triple treat for Halloween
3. Article: Creepy Irish Creatures
4. Article: Ghosts
5. Article: An Irish Halloween
6. Article: The Dullahan – Ireland’s headless horseman
7. Article: An Irish Halloween – part 2
8. The Irish Kitchen: Barm Brack
9. Basic Irish: Halloween and Samhain
10. Kids’ Ireland: Irish children learning through film
So there you have it until we write again - sometime in November..
If you are planning on getting married between now and then or tied the knot in the month of October, here is your special verse:
If in October you do marry,
Love will come but riches tarry
I can attest to this and the riches are still tarrying
But the love did come and stayed for a very long time, thank God
And, if you are celebrating a birthday, anniversary or other special event between now and our next edition, we hope it's an occasion filled with joy and happiness. With Halloween approaching, we’ll take our leave with this blessing:
Blessing of the seasonal Saints
- Yeech, I’ll keep the stomach ache
Saints of Grey Winter
All the best & God Bless,
Bridget & Russ
Get down on your knees and thank God you’re still on your feet.
Téigh ar do ghlúine is bí buíoch le Dia go bhfuil tú fós ar do chosa.
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LEAVE 'EM LAUGHING
Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop. Right away they go over to the bird section.
Gerry says to Paddy, “That’s them”. The clerk comes over and asks if he can help them. “Yeah, we’ll take four of them birds in that cage up there,” says Gerry. “Put them in a paper bag.”
The clerk does this and the two men pay for the birds and leave the shop. They get into Gerry’s van and drive until they are high up in the hills and stop at the top of a cliff with a 500-foot drop.
“This looks like a grand place, eh?” says Gerry.
“Oh, yeah, this looks good,” replies Paddy.
They flip a coin and Gerry wins the toss. “I guess I git to go first, eh Paddy?” says Gerry. He then takes two birds out of the bag, places them on his shoulders and jumps off the cliff.
Paddy watches as his mate drops off the edge and goes straight down for a few seconds, followed by a ‘SPLAT’.
As Paddy looks over the edge of the cliff he shakes his head and says, “Screw that, this budgie jumpin’ is too dangerous for me…”
Birds part 2
A minute later, Seamus arrives at the cliff. He too has been to the pet shop and he walks up carrying the familiar “peeper bag”.
He pulls a parrot out of the bag, and then Paddy notices that, in his other hand, Seamus is carrying a gun. “Hi, Paddy – watch this”, Seamus says and launches himself over the edge of the cliff. Paddy watches as half way down, Seamus takes the gun and blows the parrot’s head off. Seamus continues to plummet until there is a SPLAT, as he joins Gerry’s remains at the bottom. Paddy shakes his head and says, “Bejasus, that parrotshootin’ is also too dangerous for me.”
Birds part 3
A few minutes later, Sean strolls up. He too has been to the pet shop and he walks up carrying the familiar paper bag. However, instead of a parrot or a budgie, he pulls a chicken out of the bag, and launches himself of the cliff with the same result as the other two men. Once more Paddy shakes his head – “Acchh, first there was Gerry wit’ his budgie jumping, then Seamus parrotshootin’ and now this hen gliding…”
This story developed just before I put the newsletter to bed and I didn’t want to miss it.
Saints of the Year,
Outside of God's Palace
Fiends wait with malice
Let them not take beloved
souls going in,
Saints of Grey Winter
Saints of the Year
Waking or sleeping,
to our graves creeping,
Life in its night
hold us God's light
Saints of four seasons,
saints of the year.
Edited and adapted
from an old Celtic blessing.
Hurricane Ophelia: All schools and colleges closed as red weather warning extended nationwide.
HSE appointments, Bus Éireann services, postal services and court sittings cancelled ahead of worst storm in 50 years.
For all of you who have supported Irish Culture and Customs all these years – thank you.
When you start to buy your Christmas gifts don’t forget to go through the web Site. If you use Amazon, click on ‘Shopping’ at the top of the page and the next page you see will have Amazon at the top. Anything you buy from Amazon through our site pays a (very small) commission. It beats a blank and it doesn’t effect your price. Thank you again.